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Jan 21st, 2009 at 11:32:33 - Grand Theft Auto - San Andreas (PS2) |
Thankfully I got my urge to play morally out of the way the first time around because from here on out its maximum carnage. Despite GTA's reputation for lawlessness, there are certain statutes that CJ simply cannot break, those being the natural laws of physics and thank God for that. After stealing an awesome red sports car, I decided to put these laws to the test by hitting up some jumps. Unless CJ has the proper speed and car orientation, these jumps can be disastrous for his health, flying through the air into a tree will throw CJ from the vehicle and send him tumbling onto the street, taking off a bit of health for each impact on the concrete, or grass if the jump took him to a park. Based on this information, I assumed that jumping off of tall buildings would be fatal and I was right, as long as its five stories or higher. With full health he actually walked away from a four story plummet into an alleyway, but there were some discarded trash bags to break his fall...so at least some natural laws held up in this game.
I realize I said last time that I was done with moral activity in San Andreas, but there were some missions in the game where CJ isn't all bad. You actually have a mission in an Ambulance where you drive injured citizens to the hospital. This gets pretty hectic at higher levels, which is a good thing since it rewards the player for staying focused on helping out sick people instead of taking detours to run over loiterers on the side walk or shooting at police cars. However my personal favorite "moral" mission was the vigilante one, since it allowed me to use the fun aspects of the game, such as shooting at people, for the good of the citizens of San Andreas by shutting criminals down, never mind the hypocrisy that after the mission was over I blew up a gas station.
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Jan 21st, 2009 at 11:13:12 - Grand Theft Auto - San Andreas (PS2) |
GTA is a game that has been oft lambasted by the mainstream media as being too violent and sending a bad message to children, plus there was that whole "Hot Coffee fiasco" as well. Actually, on the topic of that, I decided to have my first run in the game to be performing activities that would be viewed as acceptable to the general public...for future reference, this was the shortest run of the game. Buying things of street vendors and actually being a good citizen is one of the least rewarding and most boring things one can do in this game. The only thing mildly interesting was going on a date with CJ's girlfriend then taking her back to her house to bang, unfortunately that lost any appeal after Rockstar was forced to re-release the game without the hot coffee mod. Not that I get my rocks off on pixelated porn, but it sure beats not hitting people with cars, stopping at red traffic lights and resisting the urge to steal really nice rides. I don't think Kant would like this game, because there's definitely no reason to follow his "oughts" regarding...well anything that involves murder, larceny and sexual harassment.
The other thing "legal" and "moral" that a person can do in GTA is to accessorize CJ, introducing a few RPG elements to the game. However, instead of armor and magic bonuses, giving CJ the appropriate "bling" and tattoos will increase his street cred and illicit various reactions from his girlfriend (better make sure that stuff is complementary or no sex for you). Another one of the few, yet important legal activities in the game is eating. CJ has to eat healthy in this game otherwise he won't be able to run as fast or be as effective a swimmer or hand-to-hand fighter. This is the moment where I feel Rockstar is really reaching out to send a positive message to the kids. "Hey Junior, be sure to eat a balanced diet with fruits and veggies, not just cheeseburgers. Then you too can wantonly slaughter innocents and police officers with great effect!"
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