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baizerker's Goldeneye 007 (N64)
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| [January 25, 2008 12:07:59 AM]
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So I sat down for another few rounds of Goldeneye with my friends with a heavy sigh. As usual, I was destroyed in every round, the game making my shortcomings all the more painful by adding notes such as "Most Harmless," and "Most Cowardly" after each battle. It was annoying enough listening to my friends shreik with laughter at my noobishness, but now the fucking video game itself is insulting me?! AGRAA! This is not incentive to practice...but to smash the thing.
My incompetence aside, I can understand how the competitive aspect of the game is so engaging to those who invest years of practice into mastering it. Battles and firefights can be intense and close, often sending my friends into a manic state. It's almost worth playing just to participate in the experience... until I spawn gunless in the middle of said firefight, running around very slowly and jerkily, chopping at nothing as I'm blasted into oblivion.
Design
I played a little single player on my own and found it pretty boring. Shoot a bunch of soldiers. Shoot a bunch of scientists. Shoot a bunch of whatever. The aesthetics change from level to level, but there is no variation to the game play, which gets old quick. Like I said, people don't play Goldeneye for its single player mode; they live for multiplayer.
An interesting note about the game's reward structure I found out was that it was purely psychological (regarding multiplayer, single player unlocks levels and characters, but like I said, nobody plays the single player mode; it was beaten fifty times in fifth grade already). Players compete to win various reward titles at the end of the game, such as "Most Deadly," or "Most Professional." My neanderthalic friends always eagerly shout their reward titles after every match with glee, totally oblivious that there really is NO reward; they have all been duped by the game into believing having the title "Most Deadly" for a round of multiplayers bears some kind of significance, or that its something to be proud of, even though it vanishes after a few seconds when they begin yet another match. I tried to point this out to them, but they reacted with violence. I'm reminded of Plato's allegory of the cave, when the enlightened being tries to help free those trapped who can only see the shadows of real things. They resist, preferring their familiar lie over the scary truth. Whatever.
As I stated in my last post I hate the radar, which makes hiding or ambush impossible, There is no character customization, infact, some of the characters are badly designed: Jaws, for example, is so tall that he basically always head shots any normal character. On the other spectrum, Oddjob is so short that he's incredibly hard to shoot at all. Guns are near impossible to see against the often dark grey backgrounds. The character models themselves are hideous blocky looking things, with big polygonal heads and hands.
The unofficial sequal to Goldeneye, "Perfect Dark," addresses many of the aforementioned concerns, improving graphics tremendously, varying level play by adding co-op mode and vehicles (though its still fundamentally just shooting hordes of evil doers), and letting you model and name your own character for multiplayer play. The controls are also more responsive and sensitive. Nobody ever plays this game over Goldeneye though, despite the clear improvements. It's the nostalgic value of Goldeneye that makes people keep playing it. These kids were blown away by it in fifth grade when it came out, when it knocked all previous FPS games out of the water. Their young eyes couldn't get enough guns, blood and James Bond. To them I say, keep your memories, but it's time to grow up. Let's play some Halo.
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| [January 24, 2008 11:20:43 PM]
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Summary
Goldeneye is a first person shooter game based on the James Bond movies. In single player story mode, the player progresses through levels shooting and killing hundreds of drone like enemies in various evil villain complexes, as well as the evil villains themselves, which include classic Bond enemies such as Jaws and Oddjob (though he cannot throw his hat!).
The game also features multiplayer mode (which is why it is still popular), allowing up to four players fight it out in any of the single player levels, minus the computer controlled enemies. There are variations on the multiplayer modes that limit the type of weapons available, such as "Proximity Mines" mode (my personal favorite), "Automatics," "Pistols," and even "Throwing Knives."
Game Play
I was expecting a whole lot from this game when I sat down to play it. All of my friends rant, often frothing at the mouth, of how awesome Goldeneye is, how it's the best game ever made forever and how anyone who disagrees is clearly a stupid fucking idiot. Well, I disagreed. I hate this game.
Yes, yes, it was innovative. It defined what the first person shooter was, and would become. That's great; I acknowledge this. It did do a lot for modern FPS games, but its far from perfect, and now outdated. Though my friends will probably continue to play it until their sixties, I've found much more enjoyable FPS titles such as Halo or Unreal Tournament. Okay, about the game itself.
I hate the controls. Everything is awful and inverted and wrong. The joystick in the middle of the N64 controller controls the direction the character faces, but I can only work this thing with one thumb while my other fingers rest on "Z" (fire weapon), "A" (change weapon), and "B" (open doors). My other hand works the yellow directional pad which allows me to side step, which assists in dodging gunfire. Anyway, I'm working the joystick with that one thumb furiously (...pause) and I keep pushing the damn thing up or down instead of sideways, so I keep looking up and down too much and shooting at nothing while I get killed.
The avatar is also incredibly slow to respond (especially when compared to modern FPS games). I run at an agonizingly slow pace, making escape from enemies impossible. And I can't see the damn guns (first of all, what magic gun fairy leaves nice little bundles of ammunition and automatic weapons lying around everywhere?)! The guns are so dark they blend in with also dark (and often grey and ugly) tilesets. Without a trained 007 eye developed over years of obsession, I find myself often unable to find a gun, while my friends blast me to pieces with RPC 90s.
I hate the radar system, which points a nice arrow in your direction for your enemies, making ambush or hiding impossible.
All these stupid little things take getting used to, and when playing in a room full of veterans, there is NO learning curve. I'm essentially canon fodder in multiplayer, which gets frustrating as hell.
I can only conclude that this game has retained its popularity due to its nostalgic value, especially considering the new FPS games on the market right now with features ranging from character customization, less aggravating and more responsive controls, interactive environments (beyond the power to open doors), and of course, much, much better graphics. Aesthetics count too.
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baizerker's Goldeneye 007 (N64)
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Current Status: Playing
GameLog started on: Monday 1 January, 2001
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